Chapter 49

Some people believe I do the most for Leo season and my birthday. Well, I do! I turned it up a notch this year because I’m grateful to be in the land of the living. This past year has not been an easy year for me.

I learned more about myself and the sacrifices I would make for someone I love. I discovered that I had more strength than I realized. I learned that even in the midst of the pain and grief that I yet feel, I can make it. I learned that Chapter 48 prepared me for Chapter 49.

It’s my first birthday without my mom. For 48 years I had her in my life. This new normal has not been easy. This year required me to be extra. If I didn’t, I would’ve focused on how much I miss my mom and the birthday greetings she faithfully posted every year.

I would’ve focused on how much I miss the cake she made special just for me – German chocolate cake with milk chocolate frosting because I don’t like German chocolate frosting. I would’ve spent today being sad instead of glad.

Through all I have been through I have learned the importance of carpe diem – seize the day! I’m determined to live a life of no regrets. I want to make the most of every moment I have remaining on this earth. I’m determined to have meaningful relationships, and appreciate when someone cuts me out of their lives because they are doing me a favor. They are helping me to invest in those that want to have meaningful relationships with me. I’ve learned that life is short and I should experience everything I want to experience.

Resist Chicago Resist!

Folks always have something to say. At least Father Pfleger is true to his activism for the community. Are protests supposed to make us comfortable? Will we agree with all protests? Everyone has the right to protest. A protest is supposed to shake things up, bring attention to disparities, and facilitate change.

The truth is some folks don’t care about the shootings in Chicago because it’s not happening in their neighborhood. Well, guess what? One day shootings could be happening in your neighborhood or one of your family members could be a victim of gun violence. Then, you will want everyone involved in being an activist against gun violence.

I think about my family members and it’s only God’s grace that it hasn’t been one of my family members or me the victim of gun violence. We are good at talking mess about what needs to happen and what everyone else should be doing. Well, what about you? What are you willing to do for things to change?

If you are interested in protesting against gun violence in Chicago, please click here. Shut the Dan Ryan down on July 7th!

Without My Mom On Mother’s Day

I haven’t been able to write a proper blog post, since my mom passed. This is my first Mother’s Day without her. Celebrating Mother’s Day is bittersweet. I’m trying to smile and show I’m happy because I’m a mother, but at the same time I’m crying on the inside.

Crying because my mom is gone. Crying because I miss her so much. Crying because I haven’t been the same since she passed, and I don’t believe I will ever be the same. Crying because my heart is damaged.

I was doing okay this week until this post showed in my memories.

I cried and cried because she’s not here for me to tell her how much I love her. Oh, I told her, but I would love for her to still be alive to hear my sentiments. I told my husband I don’t have a mother anymore to buy a Mother’s Day card.

Foolishly I tried to continue to look at my social media feeds thinking I can handle seeing Mother’s Day post. I looked at it as tough love therapy for myself. Read the post because I can’t withdraw from social media every Mother’s Day. This was a bad decision because each post seemed to stab me in my already damaged heart.

I came to the realization that I can’t handle Mother’s Day on social media. Truthfully, I’m struggling to navigate Mother’s Day weekend. I don’t have to act like I’m so strong. I can admit that I don’t want to see your Mother’s Day post, and I’m not a bad person because I don’t want to see them. I can log out. It’s okay for me to figure out what’s best for me and act accordingly.

Mother’s Day will never be the same for me, and I’m learning to live in my truth.

Picture This!


Would you be able to get over it? How about that happen a long time ago, so let it go?! I’m not racist; that was my ancestors. I don’t see color. We all are equal. The constitution is for all of us. Show your patriotism by standing and pledging allegiance to the flag.  

From the beginning, this country was built on my ancestors backs. Mass prison incarceration is modern day slavery. The very laws were not created as me being equal. My people were not counted as a whole being, but 3/5! While the forefathers were talking about liberty and justice for all, my people were being used as free labor; and if they didn’t comply murdered!  

So, the next time you want to tell me to get over it, or that happen a long time ago, which I have been told by White and Black people; picture this image and hush! This is my platform and I will use it to inform about issues that impact my people, me and those that empathize with our struggle.

Chapter 47 of the Book “Annjanette”

Tonight is the last night I will be 47 years old. The night before my birthday I always reflect on the year. I think about my trials, tribulations and triumphs. My goal is to be s better me every year, and vow to not let the same things that caused me to stumble this year, cause me to stumble next year.
I have dealt with some things that I have never dealt with before, and some things that I thought I would never have to deal with again. I look back in amazement that I’m still standing. Like Marvin Sapp says in his song “Never Would’ve Made It.”

I’m stronger, I’m wiser

I’m better, much better

When I look back over all you brought me through

I can see that you were the one I held on to

The you that I held on to is God. I don’t know how anyone can navigate life without Him. I’ve been through some things this year that I could have legit lost my mind, BUT GOD said not so!! 

I took control of my health for real this past year. Not how I had done in the past, but with consistency. Little steps turned into bigger steps and now I see my progress. I’ve lost 75lbs so far!


I’m trying to live a life of quality not quantity. I don’t want to live a long time aided by medication. I want a quality life that includes living life to the fullest while healthy. 

As I reflect, I have no regrets. Every test has become a part of my story. My story shows the essence of Annjanette. My story has helped develop the strong, God-fearing confident woman I am today.

I’m ready for Chapter 48 of the book titled “Annjanette.”

What’s Hindering You?


We all face challenges that can cause us to forget our goals and dreams. We can allow obstacles to slow and even stop our progress. Along our journey, we can allow life, family, friends, limited finances, and our present social status to hinder our progress. What’s hindering you?  

Have you figured out what’s stopping you from reaching your goals? You have to determine the root cause of why you haven’t reached your goals, and move those obstacles out of your way! We have to be determined to let nothing and nobody block our progress.

I’ve learned that sometimes we don’t want to figure out what’s hindering us because we will have to deal with whatever IT is. Sometimes we don’t want to face that we will have to let dead weight go. That dead weight may be family, friends, a significant other or even that job we have had for 20 years. We have to be willing to let it go.


Choosing to let go is never easy. We like to operate within our comfort zone, but if we want to excel in every area of our lives, we have to choose to operate outside of our comfort zone. Operating outside of our comfort zone included battling fear and the unknown. We can do it! We can face whatever obstacles that are hindering us and overcome those obstacles!

Make a resolution now to remove every hindrance to your success in every area of your life. Don’t delay. Start right now!

When we tackle obstacles, we find hidden reserves of courage and resilience we did not know we had. And it is only when we are faced with failure do we realise that these resources were always there within us. We only need to find them and move on with our lives. A. P. J. Abdul Kalam

When Will It End?!

Listen, I know I may not speak for all women, but I’m ready for this to end! I feel like I’ve done my time. I contributed to society by having two children that are contributing members to society and the economy. I shouldn’t have to suffer month after month. It’s time for my period to end! Be gone already!  

Since the age of thirteen, my period has been a constant companion. If I can’t depend on anything else, she’s always right on time. Now that I’m older she makes her entrance a monthly surprise. She comes when she wants too, or not at all.  

It’s time for us to part ways. It’s been real, but enough is enough. I don’t want to buy another pad or tampon. I want to take that money and buy something else with it. I’ve been living for the day when I will be period-free! I believe the day I decided I didn’t want anymore children she should’ve went away quietly.  

She doesn’t go away quietly. She does her best to wreak havoc in your life before she leaves. She sends false signals that she’s leaving. Then she comes back with a vengeance. What kind of hocus pocus magic is this? Leave and leave now.

I’ve decided when she finally leaves and stays gone I’m throwing a party in honor of her departure! I’m inviting everybody! I’ll be giving away every pad and tampon that I still own, and I’ll even by some for party favors. My gift to those who still need them. My party will be a celebration to the entrance of menopause. I can’t wait!

You Are Worth It!


So many times others may make us feel that we are not worthy of their love. That we have only conditional approval with them. That we have to jump through hoops and leap tall buildings to even begin to measure up to their requirements. Well, if no one has told you lately, I want to let you know that you are valuable!

You have so much to offer, and it is time to tap into yourself and determine your worth. People will treat us how we allow them to treat us. We have to expect to be treated like a rare diamond because we are a rare diamond.

We have so much untapped potential. Imagine our value, if we only knew our worth. How much are you worth? What do you bring to the table? Shouldn’t a potential mate bring at least the same thing to the table as you bring to the table? Why do we think it is okay to accept crumbs, when we can have the entire meal?

When you recognize your worth, you won’t allow others to abuse your kindness. When you recognize your worth, you won’t do things that lessen your worth. You will not degrade yourself so the other person can feel valued. When you recognize your worth, others will recognize your worth too. Some people won’t even approach you because they will recognize that they have to approach you correctly, or not at all. 

So, I ask you again – what is you worth? Isn’t it time you find out?

Rejection is Not the Final Answer


Rejection seems cruel and we don’t feel good after being rejected.  Nobody wants to be rejected for any reason, but rejection does happen.  Rejection is not the final answer.  It’s how we handle the rejection.

Recently, I experienced rejection at work.  I wasn’t happy, and I’ll admit that I haven’t fully recovered from feeling rejected.  However, I learned some lessons from the rejection that will help me achieve success.

In every trial and test we go through we have to determine what am I supposed to learn from this experience.  Our comeback determines our future success. 

 Here’s some lessons I have learned from rejection:

1.  I can say no. So many times we relinquish our power by giving in to be used, but saying no reclaims our power over our future.
2. I have a lot to offer. The skills and experiences that I bring to the table speak for themselves. It’s time I recognize that and not expect anyone else to validate me.

3. Write my vision for my future and begin to set my vision in motion by completing tasks that will get me closer to the fruition of my vision.

4. Take the limits off of me. Don’t limit myself to being placed in a box with a lid, but enlarge my territory and refuse to have lids placed on me.

5. Don’t be afraid to take chances.  

6. Always remember I have value, and refuse to allow anyone to belittle my value in their actions or deeds.

7. I can be angry and not act out. There’s a way to express myself without negativity being attached to my words or actions.

8. Let it go! Don’t let this situation hinder my progress.

9. I choose to make feeling rejected a temporary feeling. 

10. Learn all I can because I want my results to be maturity and growth.

Rejection doesn’t feel good, but the lessons learned from rejection are priceless.

When You’re Drowning in Staying Woke and Being Deep

There are some folks that are just too woke and deep for their own good. When does good ol common sense kick in? When does analyzing the decisions and actions of others go to far? Quit trying to psychoanalyze every word and action. Let it go and recognize it is what it is. Some stuff is just not that deep!
Here are some mantras to remember to remove yourself from drowning in being woke and deep:

1. Everybody doesn’t have to agree with you.

2. It’s not your job to change my mind.

3. Speak your truth.

4. Every statement doesn’t require reading between the lines. Some people actually say what they mean, and mean what they say.

5. Self-inspection is free. Try it sometimes because maybe just maybe your lack of self-inspection is the real issue.

6. Quit passing your personal issues on to others. Deal with your issues!

7. Choose to place your soapbox on the shelf.

8. JUST LET IT GO!