Picture This!


Would you be able to get over it? How about that happen a long time ago, so let it go?! I’m not racist; that was my ancestors. I don’t see color. We all are equal. The constitution is for all of us. Show your patriotism by standing and pledging allegiance to the flag.  

From the beginning, this country was built on my ancestors backs. Mass prison incarceration is modern day slavery. The very laws were not created as me being equal. My people were not counted as a whole being, but 3/5! While the forefathers were talking about liberty and justice for all, my people were being used as free labor; and if they didn’t comply murdered!  

So, the next time you want to tell me to get over it, or that happen a long time ago, which I have been told by White and Black people; picture this image and hush! This is my platform and I will use it to inform about issues that impact my people, me and those that empathize with our struggle.

What’s Hindering You?


We all face challenges that can cause us to forget our goals and dreams. We can allow obstacles to slow and even stop our progress. Along our journey, we can allow life, family, friends, limited finances, and our present social status to hinder our progress. What’s hindering you?  

Have you figured out what’s stopping you from reaching your goals? You have to determine the root cause of why you haven’t reached your goals, and move those obstacles out of your way! We have to be determined to let nothing and nobody block our progress.

I’ve learned that sometimes we don’t want to figure out what’s hindering us because we will have to deal with whatever IT is. Sometimes we don’t want to face that we will have to let dead weight go. That dead weight may be family, friends, a significant other or even that job we have had for 20 years. We have to be willing to let it go.


Choosing to let go is never easy. We like to operate within our comfort zone, but if we want to excel in every area of our lives, we have to choose to operate outside of our comfort zone. Operating outside of our comfort zone included battling fear and the unknown. We can do it! We can face whatever obstacles that are hindering us and overcome those obstacles!

Make a resolution now to remove every hindrance to your success in every area of your life. Don’t delay. Start right now!

When we tackle obstacles, we find hidden reserves of courage and resilience we did not know we had. And it is only when we are faced with failure do we realise that these resources were always there within us. We only need to find them and move on with our lives. A. P. J. Abdul Kalam

There’s A Leader Inside of You!

There’s a leader inside of you that wants to manifest in your life. Leaders have certain characteristics that set them apart from everyone else. There are so many leadership characteristics, but the characteristics that resonate with me most are honesty, positive, good communicator, integrity, confidence and transparent. What leadership characteristics resonate the most with you? You will notice that the leadership characteristics that resonate most with you are the characteristics that you will recognize most within yourself.

You may be wondering how do I know there’s a leader inside of you. There’s been an argument that will probably continue forever between leadership scholars. One school of thought is people are born leaders, and the other school of thought is people can learn to be leaders. I believe each of us has the ability to be a leader. The issue is do we want to be a leader.

Some find out because of challenges or adversity in their own lives that they are leaders. Others seem to have a natural gravitation to leadership. They always seem to be placed in positions of leadership, or are expected to lead. Are you a leader? Do you want to be a leader? What events will have to happen for you to demonstrate you are a leader?

When Will It End?!

Listen, I know I may not speak for all women, but I’m ready for this to end! I feel like I’ve done my time. I contributed to society by having two children that are contributing members to society and the economy. I shouldn’t have to suffer month after month. It’s time for my period to end! Be gone already!  

Since the age of thirteen, my period has been a constant companion. If I can’t depend on anything else, she’s always right on time. Now that I’m older she makes her entrance a monthly surprise. She comes when she wants too, or not at all.  

It’s time for us to part ways. It’s been real, but enough is enough. I don’t want to buy another pad or tampon. I want to take that money and buy something else with it. I’ve been living for the day when I will be period-free! I believe the day I decided I didn’t want anymore children she should’ve went away quietly.  

She doesn’t go away quietly. She does her best to wreak havoc in your life before she leaves. She sends false signals that she’s leaving. Then she comes back with a vengeance. What kind of hocus pocus magic is this? Leave and leave now.

I’ve decided when she finally leaves and stays gone I’m throwing a party in honor of her departure! I’m inviting everybody! I’ll be giving away every pad and tampon that I still own, and I’ll even by some for party favors. My gift to those who still need them. My party will be a celebration to the entrance of menopause. I can’t wait!

Rejection is Not the Final Answer


Rejection seems cruel and we don’t feel good after being rejected.  Nobody wants to be rejected for any reason, but rejection does happen.  Rejection is not the final answer.  It’s how we handle the rejection.

Recently, I experienced rejection at work.  I wasn’t happy, and I’ll admit that I haven’t fully recovered from feeling rejected.  However, I learned some lessons from the rejection that will help me achieve success.

In every trial and test we go through we have to determine what am I supposed to learn from this experience.  Our comeback determines our future success. 

 Here’s some lessons I have learned from rejection:

1.  I can say no. So many times we relinquish our power by giving in to be used, but saying no reclaims our power over our future.
2. I have a lot to offer. The skills and experiences that I bring to the table speak for themselves. It’s time I recognize that and not expect anyone else to validate me.

3. Write my vision for my future and begin to set my vision in motion by completing tasks that will get me closer to the fruition of my vision.

4. Take the limits off of me. Don’t limit myself to being placed in a box with a lid, but enlarge my territory and refuse to have lids placed on me.

5. Don’t be afraid to take chances.  

6. Always remember I have value, and refuse to allow anyone to belittle my value in their actions or deeds.

7. I can be angry and not act out. There’s a way to express myself without negativity being attached to my words or actions.

8. Let it go! Don’t let this situation hinder my progress.

9. I choose to make feeling rejected a temporary feeling. 

10. Learn all I can because I want my results to be maturity and growth.

Rejection doesn’t feel good, but the lessons learned from rejection are priceless.

46 Life Lessons I’ve Learned…


Today is my birthday and I was reflecting on the life lessons I’ve learned over the past 46 years. All of these lessons have truly molded and shaped me into the woman I am today.

These life lessons are not listed in order of importance, and there’s a story behind each lesson.

1. I have to love myself.

2. I’m my own Stan (fan)!

3. Sometimes I have to encourage myself.

4. God has to be a priority in my life.

5. Family is important.

6. Treat others the way I want to be treated.

7. Forgiveness frees me.

8. I can do bad by myself.

9. I know my worth.

10. Common sense will get you further than book sense.

11. Don’t lie.

12. Integrity is important.

13. Word is bond.

14. Be careful of the company you keep.

15. Be a good friend.

16. It’s not always about me.

17. Karma is real.

18. My husband is my best friend.

19. Happiness is a choice.

20. My life has purpose.

21. Hell is real.

22. Be authentic.

23. Live a life without regrets.

24. Stress kills.

25. Be informed 

26. A mind is a terrible thing to waste.

27. Read on a regular basis.

28. Be open to constructive criticism.

29. Travel as often as I can.

30. Invest in myself.

31. Enjoy life to the fullest.

32. Pray.

33. Don’t sweat the small stuff.

34. Cultivate friendships 

35. Don’t let anyone misuse me.

36. Be honest.

37. Laugh often

38. Have a sense of humor.

39. Don’t be judgmental.

40. It okay to say I’m sorry.

41. Everybody will not like me.

42. Sex is good.

43. Be a good parent.

44. Be trustworthy.

45. Don’t go to bed angry.

46. Eat something you’ve never eaten before.

Cheers to these life lessons, and I can’t wait for the next 46 more! Happy Birthday to me!

Life Lesson From A Six Year Old


My daughter and I were discussing politics with my granddaughter. My granddaughter wouldn’t listen to us telling her she wasn’t old enough to vote. My daughter kept messing with her until my granddaughter calmly said TCOB.
We immediately asked, “What is TCOB?” She said, “Take Care of Your Own Business.” We laughed! I asked her, “Where did you learn that?” She said, “From my teacher at school. That’s what we say when somebody is in our business.” I said, “When you say TCOB, what does the person do?” She said, “They get out of your business.”

What an awesome life lesson for a six-year-old! She’s already learning to mind her own business, while keeping people out of her business. She’s being taught how to positively communicate what could be considered negative feedback to some.

Taking Care of Your Own Business requires focus and determination. If I’m taking care of my business, I don’t have time to focus on your business.

The next time someone tries to be in your business just tell them

Friends – How Many Of Us Have Them?

I’m convinced that a lot of people don’t know how to be a friend. They don’t understand the actions or inactions of a friend. Essentially, if asked to describe what a friend looks like, they would fail.

Let me tell you what a friend is not. A friend is not someone that has to pledge allegiance only to you. A friend is not someone that has to dislike who you dislike and like who you like. These mean girl terms of friendships should’ve disappeared when we left elementary school. It’s unfortunate that some of us are still mean girls. We are frozen in time and have yet to mature into adulthood.

My BFF and I rarely have a phone conversation. We send random text from time to time. However, when we are fortunate to get together, it’s as if we have never been apart. The conversation continues like we have always been talking. I know that she has my back and I have hers. There’s no denying our bond

If you have friends or friends, you are fortunate. Treasure and cultivate those friendships. Don’t take them for granted. Some of you may wonder do you have any friends. Here are five signs that the people you are hanging with are not your friends.

1. They let you walk around all day with a visible booger in your nose for everyone to see.

2. They don’t tell you your breath stinks, or that you have a foul body odor.

3. They talk about you negatively to others.

4. They know you need a fashion makeover, but they just continue to let you look a hot mess in public.

5. They don’t tell you the truth. They would rather let you think you are right instead of calling you out on your foolishness.

If you have people in your life that fit these “friendship” signs, you need to let those people go. They are harmful to your positive growth. They are not adding any value to your life.

Whodini’s lyrics to the song “Friends” provides a great conclusion to defining a friend.  Here’s just some of the lyrics:

Friends, how many of us have them?

Friends, ones we can depend on

Friends, how many of us have them?

Friends, before we go any further

Lets be friends

Is a word we use everyday

Most the time we use it in the wrong way

Now you can look the word up, again and again

But the dictionary doesn’t know the meaning of friends

And if you ask me, you know, I couldn’t be much help

Because a friend is somebody you judge for yourself

Some are okay, and they treat you real cool

But some mistake kindness for bein’ a fool

We like to be with some, because they’re funny

Others come around when they need some money

Some you grew up with, around the way

And you’re still real close too this very day

Homeboys through the summer, winter, spring and fall

And then there’s some we wish we never knew at all

And this list goes on, again and again

But these are the people that we call friends

Read more at http://www.songlyrics.com/whodini/friends-lyrics/#Juo467wHjoTCvX8u.99

Do You Wanna Be Happy?

  

When I found this meme, it resonated with the core of my being. We live in a world where some people place their happiness in the hands of others. Why would a person choose to allow someone else to have that much power over them? I want to make sure I understand: How the person feels or treats you controls your happiness?! I refuse to allow anyone that much power over me!

We watch movies, videos and TV; and believe that another’s love makes us happy. We buy into the false reality we see in the media and believe statements like:

I can’t live without you.

I can’t breathe without you.

You complete me.

As long as I have you, I’m happy.

  
Guess who’s responsible for your happiness? You are! It’s selfish of you to make me or anyone else responsible for your happiness. I’m trying to handle my happiness. Do you want to know why you are responsible for your happiness? Because you’re accountable for your actions and inactions. 

 
It’s easy to make someone else responsible because then you are able to play the “blame game.” It’s always someone else’s fault. No, it’s your fault! You own your happiness. If you’re not happy, it’s time for self-reflection. It’s time to ask yourself some difficult questions and be man or woman enough to acknowledge what’s hindering your happiness.

Here’s my Happiness Plan:

1. Self-reflection: Time to determine why happiness eludes me.

2. A Plan: What am I going to do to be happy? Write it down. Create a vision board.  

3. Make it happen: Put your plan in action.

Let me know how my plan works for you. I can’t wait to read your happiness reports!

*I am not the creator of the above memes and was unable to locate the creators to provide proper acknowledgement*

Where’s Our Support?

  
Black women know what it means to struggle. We struggle with the various roles we play in our lives and the lives of others. We struggle with that S for Superwoman that has been placed on our chests. A lot of times we place that S on our chests, and then there are times others place that S on our chests. Even after we successfully navigate through each day for ourselves and our families, I’m still amazed at those who treat us like we are second class citizens.

Well, second class citizens is a stretch. We are treated like we don’t have any rights. It saddens me that we feel the harsh sting of this treatment from our own Black men. I’m used to other races treating us inferior, but to be treated inferior by Black men upsets me.

You ask me why does this upset me? I’ll tell you why. Black women have always been supportive of Black men. We work and take care of our homes when Black men can’t or won’t take care of our homes. We take care of our Black children when Black men can’t or won’t take care of our children. We are the ones that give you that second, third and fourth chance, when you mess up. So, where’s our support?

Oh, you may say we have supported Black women. Have you? As a majority have Black men supported us? Oh, you will use us for what we have to offer, but where’s our support?

Where’s the support when we are being killed by the police? Where’s the marching and the public outcry by Black men? Where’s the support when another Black man hits us? Why do you turn your head and say it’s not your problem, or say that’s what she gets? Where’s the support when we are being sexually degraded in music lyrics or made fun of about our looks? Where’s the support when we are being called bitches and thots?

When are Black men going to speak up as a majority and say you will respect Black women?! You will not place your hands on a Black woman! I will not be a part of a conversation that degrades Black women.

Oh we struggle, but one area we don’t struggle with is supporting Black men. Where’s our support?