I didn’t watch the R Kelly documentary last night, and don’t plan to watch. I have read some of the posts that have came across my newsfeed. So, teenage girls are fast and were given what they wanted 😳😑😑. Men have been doing it forever, so it’s ok?!! Nothing was said about Elvis Presley and other white men?!! I almost can’t place into words my reaction to these statements!
Are y’all serious?! So, this is how we make it okay to victimize young people?!!! I wonder if it was your child would you still have those feelings? We have sexualized Black children and held them accountable like they are adults, and this is wrong! These are children! There are grown women and men that have been bamboozled by abusers and we expect children to recognize an abuser and say no?!
I am a victim of sexual abuse by a family member and an authority figure. I was just a child and didn’t know what to do. I told on the authority figure and he publicly shamed me while I wasn’t present. He said I was lying on him, and people believed him. I never looked at him the same again. I forgave him for my growth, but I told my mom if he doesn’t ask God for forgiveness in hell will he lift up his eyes.
I’ve never said anything to the family member. Since I’ve been grown, I finally told my mom. I forgave the family member too, but a conversation needs to take place for that person to know the affect of their actions. The sad part is the person probably doesn’t even remember because I’m sure I wasn’t the only one.
Quit blaming victims. If you still choose to listen to R Kelly’s music that’s your choice, but don’t blame victims to make you feel better about your choice!
“You may encounter many defeats, but you must not be defeated. In fact, it may be necessary to encounter the defeats, so you can know who you are, what you can rise from, how you can still come out of it.” – Maya Angelou
2018 hasn’t been my best year. Learning to live on without my mom has not been easy. I’ve had good days and I’ve had days where I stayed in the bed with the covers pulled over my head. I’ve learned to go with the flow and live in the moment. If I feel like crying, I go ahead and cry. I’ve learned to embrace and acknowledge my feelings, so I can move forward.
2018 has been the year for dealing with my emotions. I used to bury my emotions. Burying emotions is not good, and only leads to an explosion. An explosion affects everyone that has any contact with me. I no longer wanted to be that explosion.
Choosing not to be that explosion led to me having to deal with some things in each area of my life. I chose to deal with every area of my life and in the process learn to handle the outcome.
I’m stronger physically, mentally and spiritually. 2018 has been about being better: a better me, better wife, better mother and better friend.
Every valley and mountain has molded me into the woman I am today. I’m looking with expectation to 2019. Yet striving to BE BETTER!
Some people believe I do the most for Leo season and my birthday. Well, I do! I turned it up a notch this year because I’m grateful to be in the land of the living. This past year has not been an easy year for me.
I learned more about myself and the sacrifices I would make for someone I love. I discovered that I had more strength than I realized. I learned that even in the midst of the pain and grief that I yet feel, I can make it. I learned that Chapter 48 prepared me for Chapter 49.
It’s my first birthday without my mom. For 48 years I had her in my life. This new normal has not been easy. This year required me to be extra. If I didn’t, I would’ve focused on how much I miss my mom and the birthday greetings she faithfully posted every year.
I would’ve focused on how much I miss the cake she made special just for me – German chocolate cake with milk chocolate frosting because I don’t like German chocolate frosting. I would’ve spent today being sad instead of glad.
Through all I have been through I have learned the importance of carpe diem – seize the day! I’m determined to live a life of no regrets. I want to make the most of every moment I have remaining on this earth. I’m determined to have meaningful relationships, and appreciate when someone cuts me out of their lives because they are doing me a favor. They are helping me to invest in those that want to have meaningful relationships with me. I’ve learned that life is short and I should experience everything I want to experience.
Folks always have something to say. At least Father Pfleger is true to his activism for the community. Are protests supposed to make us comfortable? Will we agree with all protests? Everyone has the right to protest. A protest is supposed to shake things up, bring attention to disparities, and facilitate change.
The truth is some folks don’t care about the shootings in Chicago because it’s not happening in their neighborhood. Well, guess what? One day shootings could be happening in your neighborhood or one of your family members could be a victim of gun violence. Then, you will want everyone involved in being an activist against gun violence.
I think about my family members and it’s only God’s grace that it hasn’t been one of my family members or me the victim of gun violence. We are good at talking mess about what needs to happen and what everyone else should be doing. Well, what about you? What are you willing to do for things to change?
If you are interested in protesting against gun violence in Chicago, please click here. Shut the Dan Ryan down on July 7th!
I haven’t been able to write a proper blog post, since my mom passed. This is my first Mother’s Day without her. Celebrating Mother’s Day is bittersweet. I’m trying to smile and show I’m happy because I’m a mother, but at the same time I’m crying on the inside.
Crying because my mom is gone. Crying because I miss her so much. Crying because I haven’t been the same since she passed, and I don’t believe I will ever be the same. Crying because my heart is damaged.
I was doing okay this week until this post showed in my memories.
I cried and cried because she’s not here for me to tell her how much I love her. Oh, I told her, but I would love for her to still be alive to hear my sentiments. I told my husband I don’t have a mother anymore to buy a Mother’s Day card.
Foolishly I tried to continue to look at my social media feeds thinking I can handle seeing Mother’s Day post. I looked at it as tough love therapy for myself. Read the post because I can’t withdraw from social media every Mother’s Day. This was a bad decision because each post seemed to stab me in my already damaged heart.
I came to the realization that I can’t handle Mother’s Day on social media. Truthfully, I’m struggling to navigate Mother’s Day weekend. I don’t have to act like I’m so strong. I can admit that I don’t want to see your Mother’s Day post, and I’m not a bad person because I don’t want to see them. I can log out. It’s okay for me to figure out what’s best for me and act accordingly.
Mother’s Day will never be the same for me, and I’m learning to live in my truth.
Would you be able to get over it? How about that happen a long time ago, so let it go?! I’m not racist; that was my ancestors. I don’t see color. We all are equal. The constitution is for all of us. Show your patriotism by standing and pledging allegiance to the flag.
From the beginning, this country was built on my ancestors backs. Mass prison incarceration is modern day slavery. The very laws were not created as me being equal. My people were not counted as a whole being, but 3/5! While the forefathers were talking about liberty and justice for all, my people were being used as free labor; and if they didn’t comply murdered!
So, the next time you want to tell me to get over it, or that happen a long time ago, which I have been told by White and Black people; picture this image and hush! This is my platform and I will use it to inform about issues that impact my people, me and those that empathize with our struggle.
Tonight is the last night I will be 47 years old. The night before my birthday I always reflect on the year. I think about my trials, tribulations and triumphs. My goal is to be s better me every year, and vow to not let the same things that caused me to stumble this year, cause me to stumble next year.
I have dealt with some things that I have never dealt with before, and some things that I thought I would never have to deal with again. I look back in amazement that I’m still standing. Like Marvin Sapp says in his song “Never Would’ve Made It.”
I’m stronger, I’m wiser
I’m better, much better
When I look back over all you brought me through
I can see that you were the one I held on to
The you that I held on to is God. I don’t know how anyone can navigate life without Him. I’ve been through some things this year that I could have legit lost my mind, BUT GOD said not so!!
I took control of my health for real this past year. Not how I had done in the past, but with consistency. Little steps turned into bigger steps and now I see my progress. I’ve lost 75lbs so far!
I’m trying to live a life of quality not quantity. I don’t want to live a long time aided by medication. I want a quality life that includes living life to the fullest while healthy.
As I reflect, I have no regrets. Every test has become a part of my story. My story shows the essence of Annjanette. My story has helped develop the strong, God-fearing confident woman I am today.
I’m ready for Chapter 48 of the book titled “Annjanette.”
We all face challenges that can cause us to forget our goals and dreams. We can allow obstacles to slow and even stop our progress. Along our journey, we can allow life, family, friends, limited finances, and our present social status to hinder our progress. What’s hindering you?
Have you figured out what’s stopping you from reaching your goals? You have to determine the root cause of why you haven’t reached your goals, and move those obstacles out of your way! We have to be determined to let nothing and nobody block our progress.
I’ve learned that sometimes we don’t want to figure out what’s hindering us because we will have to deal with whatever IT is. Sometimes we don’t want to face that we will have to let dead weight go. That dead weight may be family, friends, a significant other or even that job we have had for 20 years. We have to be willing to let it go.
Choosing to let go is never easy. We like to operate within our comfort zone, but if we want to excel in every area of our lives, we have to choose to operate outside of our comfort zone. Operating outside of our comfort zone included battling fear and the unknown. We can do it! We can face whatever obstacles that are hindering us and overcome those obstacles!
Make a resolution now to remove every hindrance to your success in every area of your life. Don’t delay. Start right now!
When we tackle obstacles, we find hidden reserves of courage and resilience we did not know we had. And it is only when we are faced with failure do we realise that these resources were always there within us. We only need to find them and move on with our lives. A. P. J. Abdul Kalam
We spend so much time focusing on others that we forget about ourselves. We forget about our dreams, visions and passions. We place ourselves on the bottom of the priority list hoping that one day we will be able to pursue our dreams, visions and passions. It is important that we begin to invest in ourselves.
Investing in us means making ourselves a priority. No longer will we place ourselves low on the priority list.
If we don’t think what we want to accomplish is a high priority, no one else will think our dreams, visions and passions are a high priority.
It’s time to assess our current situation and determine it’s time to pursue our dreams, visions and passions.
It is time for self-reflection. What are we allowing to hinder us from pursuing our dreams, visions and passions? When are we going to take the first step and make ourselves a priority? What are we waiting on? I was watching a video yesterday and the speaker said the graveyard is full of unfulfilled dreams, visions and inventions. We don’t want to live this earth without being able to say we did everything we wanted to do, and we diligently pursued our dreams, visions and passions.
Let’s make a new pledge to ourselves that we will no longer place ourselves at the bottom of our priority list. We will invest in ourselves! We will dust the cobwebs off of our dreams, visions and passions and immediately begin developing our success plan.